CAUSED MY THERAPIST TO NEED A THERAPIST!!

You are not a failure and are definitely not wasting anyone's time. We love you here and if you were no longer here, we could not forget that you existed, never going to happen.

You say "My husband needs a new wife, my kids need a new mother, my friends need a new friend, my employers need a new employee"... they don't need a new anything, they just need the old you back. They all love you and would do anything for you.

You have known your therapist a long time. She has been through a lot with you and she certainly cares about you. I think it is healthy for a therapist to seek help. They are human too; it's hard not to feel your pain, the ups and downs as if she is feeling all these things too. She feels just as helpless as you and just wants you to get better. Therapists need to be physically and emotionally solid to take on the emotional and intellectual lives of those they are trying to help; like I said, their human, it can get too much for them too. I'm not sure if that makes sense, but your therapist has offered you a great opportunity which we have spoken about and I really hope that you will consider that? Please think hard and carefully about the possibilities of it helping you.

You are not a disappointment. I believe you still want to fight, and I will be here with you every step of the way. I would not be better off without you... if I have no-one to lean against, what happens then, I will never be able to stand up!

I don't know your parents, but I cannot believe they would have thought you were a disappointment. You are anything but. Continue to fight, for them if you can't for yourself. Keep making them proud. I know you can do it!!

"survivor5" -

Based on what you have written here in your post - there is nothing telling me that your therapist is suggesting to you that she needs a therapist. I see your therapist feeling she wants more help for you by finding other therapists to help you recover - and nothing else.

I have noticed over time in chatting with you - you do tend to jump to conclusions.

Did your therapist say in the e-mail ... "survivor5" needs help?" or did she say "the therapist (her) needs help?".

And if it was in regards to the therapist - did she mean she needed help for herself? Or to help you to get better?

When we first met ... it was at a time when your therapist also did something that you were very unhappy about. But as time went by - you realized your therapist did it for your safety because she cares about you. Your therapist has been helping you all this time for free - does that not in itself tell you that she cares. She has been willing to come to your home and even fly with you on the plane to be by your side on the way to a treatment center.

And remember - she is also having some concerns with her own daughter's health.

I have to wonder on one issue tho ...

You said your nutritionist recently said you were looking better than before - and now your therapist thinks you look worse and need extra help ...

Which one is right and which one is mistaken? One of them must be - you could not have changed that quickly in a matter of days.

And in regards to "Group-Light" and my eye exam with the specialist - I didn't go to either because I couldn't give a shit. I didn't even try.

But no matter on how I feel about myself ... I still do care about you - and am still willing to try.

YAMF - your "Big Brother" - Mike

i see you progress and i am sure you are making it. i ask that the Lord grant you peace of heart and mind and soul and body. you are in my thoughts and prayers and i pray that you see the Hand of God working in your life. btw it is a misconception to think that YOU can cause anyone to do or be or think or feel anything. think about it. love and peace of the God of us all, maria

Mike-I'm so glad I was able to talk with you tonight. I didn't know where i was going to find another "Big Brother". Nobody else would put up with me. I think its time, though, that you start listening to your little sister. She would probably do better at taking care of someone else's life better than her own. You need to make another eye appointment and keep it this time. You didn't check with me before you decided not to go. Your eye is not going to get better on its own. I'm glad I hadn't ran you off as I suspected. I thought I had drove my therapist crazy and was running people off from SG. That day was extremely hard for me. As far as my nutritionist or therapist being right, I don't really know. I think my nutritionist expected me to look worse than I did and I put on a smile so she didn't know what was going on inside. I can't fool my therapist at all. I have tried and tried. It just never works. Hope I can talk with you again soon! Take care!

Maria-Thanks so much for always caring and saying prayers for me. I am having a hard time right now. My therapist called me and explained why she needed additional help to know how to help me. She is very concerned because I seem to be sliding backwards. It doesn't help that I have to be out of work even longer. I am still making it for now.

It is great that your therapist is helping u find additional help-that shows she cares about u.

Also most therapists have participated in therapy themselves as "patients" bc it helps then understand what it is like to be a patient -so ur therapist may very well see a therapist but they'd be discussing her own issues not yours

I have had a therapist tell me that I need to see a therapist who specialized in the type help she felt I needed. She told me that I would only be seeing her (my in-plan therapist) for crisis support until I had seen an out of plan therapist. Some times the aproach a therapist learned is not the best match for a patient. You are lucky that she is looking for more support for you. she wants you to succeed,

Thanks Tinkerbella and Tools, I really appreciate your replies. You are right I am very lucky that my therapist cares enough to want me to get better. I just hate that I need so much help. She is so good at her job that it upsets me that she can't help me. She tells me it is because she doesn't know enough about Eating Disorders. She is trying everything to get me in a treatment center, but I can't go. I don't like to go anywhere. I can't imagine being thousands of miles from home. I would never survive the plane ride. I am very touched that she is willing to go with me and make the trip back by herself. That says alot for how caring she is of others. I'm not sure right now what is going to happen, but I hope I can find a way to recovery.

you have hope. this is a positive thing i hope you can see this love and peace be unto you dear little sister, maria

Hi survivor how have u been doing? been thinking about u? I think getting extra help is a good thing-the more people supporting u the better, Also, most therapist have at one time or are currently seeing a therapist--and i know in school they mock counsel eachother-bc it helps them know what its like to be a patient/makes them a better therapist/plus their human just like us so have their own problems/issues etc-so it is likely ur therapist sees a therapist=but it would have nothing to do with you, My individual therapist here at the treatment center grew up w. an alcoholic dad/parents in a dysfunctional relationship & she was raped by her abusive bf in college so she could relate to some of my issues--and actually her own pain caused her to want to become a therapist -she also sought professional help after leaving her bf--so more then likely ur therapist has seen a therapist too =) Hope your doing ok.

Thank you for thinking about me. I'm hurting bad today and have been very lonely. I posted a new thread a few minutes ago before I saw this. I felt like noone cared. I appreciate you always being here for me!!